As you go through your simple and plain life, do you ever think about how having extraordinary abilities would be super-cool?  I think most people do (besides me and Adam) which is why “Heroes” (Ordinary People with Extraordinary Abilities) was so popular (before it sucked.)

What ability would you want?  Flight?  Claws?  Concussive Eye Ray Thingies That Make You Wear A Super Cool Visor? A blue tail?  I always thought Super Speed would be cool (I am always 5 minutes late to something).  BUT, I think I found the super-power I want NEED.

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That’s what the Pope was saying, so I’m told.

Carbon dating tests were performed on tiny bone fragments from a sarcophagus in the Basilica of St. Paul in Rome, and revealed to be from someone who lived in the first or second century. The Pope said that this proves they are the bones of the Apostle St. Paul.

It’s great that the church is finally embracing science. We just need to explain to them now that science is sort of the opposite of religion in that it’s based on facts and tends to be pretty specific. Not always totally specific – You know, black holes and all. But maybe a bit more narrowed in.

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The idea of widespread, rampant, child abuse in the Catholic Church is clearly so painful for Catholics, that they can’t even bring themselves to protest at college campuses about it.

I understand this. It is a difficult issue to face, and must be dealt with in secrecy and in hiding. Which is why I’m so happy for Catholics that they can finally find catharsis in the issue of President Obama delivering the commencement address at Notre Dame. They are clearly bursting at the seams with anger over widespread, rampant child-abuse in the Church, and are lucky that they finally have another issue at which they can vent this pent up frustration. What a relief for them, to be so angry for so long about widespread, rampant child abuse in the church, and now to have the good fortune of finding another issue over which they can really make their anger public, even if it’s at something other than widespread, rampant child abuse in the church. Because it’s not good to keep that kind of anger bottled up.

I only hope for their sake, that a priest never fondles a fetus, because the utter confusion over whether to be publicly outraged or privately dismissive, might make their heads explode.

Today I saw a license plate that said “Yay God 1.” I wasn’t immediately sure what it could have meant, but after some thinking, I have some ideas. It could have been like “Yay! God Won! People counted him/her down and out, but s/he came back and did it! If a half-footed kicker from New Orleans can kick a 63-yarder with two seconds left, then God can surely win!”

It might have been intended to inform us that God is #1 – sort of the license plate equivalent of a big foam hand. Which makes me think there may be a market for such a foam hand. How entrepreneurial would I be if I had 500 of those made and sold them outside of Willow Creek on a Sunday morning? The minister sure would be surprised that morning. Happily surprised, I bet. And I’d gross $5k.

Then I wondered why they didn’t just put “God is #1.” I realize it loses some punch without “Yay” but we would not be wondering right now what they meant.

Is it possible that they’re referring to God senior – like God the First, or God I? If so, who’s God the Second? Likely Jesus, right? But he’s not God the Second, nor even God at all. Regardless of where you are on the Divinity vs. Humanity debate of Jesus, we can all likely agree that Jesus is Jesus, whether Lord and Savior or just the messenger, he’s not quite actually God. In fact, to most people I know the Big J is more a social activist who got a little big for his britches. And we’re not even getting into the whole mess of the Matthew, Mark & Luke versions of Jesus vs. the Jesus of John’s book. F–k that noise.

I wonder if I’ll see that car again. It’s near the Starbucks I most regularly frequent, so it’s possible. If so, I’m going to get my cup o’ joe and go hide in the bushes to see who they are. I don’t see many born-agains except for on TV. What do they look like? Once I see them though, I’m totally going to start talking to them from the Bushes.