I’m Going to Refinance, and I Don’t Know Why
I’m going to be honest, I hadn’t actually thought about taking advantage of ”Obama’s Refinance Plan.” But now I just might.
The Five Greatest Presidents EVER
Hey folks, Fred the Tuckpointer here. Hope everyone had a Happy New Year, and marked 2010 as the year Obama Failed. Sorry that I haven’t checked in for awhile, but I’ve been busier than a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest. My new tuckpointing gig has been extended – the ol’ Terminal Tower is [...]
Obama cost me my job…
Hey folks, Fred the Tuckpointer here with a story that starts off horrible but ends up well because of conservatism. I’d been staying with my sister Mis while my shoulder healed after I hurt it falling off the side of our house. Wal-Mart doesn’t pay for sick time off so I knew I had to [...]
Hey, Liberal Media, liberal it up a little.
In all the columns and pages and reports and articles about how Obama’s approval rating’s dropping to a level that George Bush would’ve killed Neal for – in all the stories about how the Town Halls must be making really good points and damaging the President and showing that he doesn’t know anything and how [...]
Obama Ties Shoes; Conservatives Pissed!
There are several ways to debate issues.
1. You debate the issue. Is the Public Option socialist or not/will it get the job done or not. For example.
2. You debate how you debate the issue: Should we act like under-educated screaming lunatics at public forums, or should we behave with passion yet civility and focus on [...]
Mr. President, Just Get the Flu Shot
Can we stop pretending that the President of the United States is just a regular guy? Can we just accept that the President is actually the President? Of the United States? Can we do that?
The President told CNN’s John King that the First Family will
“stand in line like everybody else” for the flu shot.
Tea Party Slammer
Hey folks, Fred the Tuckpointer here with one you’ll never believe. Last time I blogged, I was telling you all about how my neighbor Don got a letter from the crummy IRS telling him he owed big time. I’d been seeing all these “tea parties” on TV where a bunch of people who hate President [...]
“Jezz Google, calm down”
This great post stolen entirely by comedy’s Ron Babcock, who can be found here.
Obama Talks to Students
The hoopla over Obama talking to the nations’ students leads me to believe 3 things:
Conservatives are truly bored
We need to help them direct their energy towards something productive
This whole thing is probably being amped up by the media, but I’ll write about it anyway.
Joe Wilson Explains Outburst
South Carolina Republican Rep. Joe Wilson has apologized for his outburst at the President during last night’s address to a joint session of Congress. He said
“I was on the phone with my wife at the time. She said she hasn’t had an orgasm in 10 years. If I’m guilty of anything, it’s poor timing [...]
Arizona preacher accidentally reveals non-existence of God by praying for still-living Barack Obama’s Death
Arizona Preacher, Steve Anderson, has openly prayed to God for the death of Barack Obama. In other news, Barack Obama remains alive, the existence of God remains in doubt.
“I hope that God strikes Barack Obama with brain cancer so he can die like Ted Kennedy and I hope it happens today.” said the Preacher to [...]
Just like a weirdo to bring a gun to a policy fight
Hey Weirdo’s, real quick. We pussy liberals aren’t upset that you brought a machine gun to a Presidential Town Hall because we hate guns. We’re upset because you brought a machine gun to a Presidential Town Hall because it’s a Presidential Town Hall. I mean, there’s no coat and tie requirement, what do you want [...]
Can I poke a hole in the Obama birth certificate conspiracy?
What parent, looking to fake their child’s birth certificate/announcement so that he can grow up to be President of The United States, misses the tiny detail that Barack Hussein Obama would be the craziest fucking name a President would ever have? You want to sneak through the system, try John Smith, or Stephe Schmidt. I’m [...]
Um, are they allowed to do this?
They are? Okay, are they allowed to follow up any of these statements with “and THAT is why Obama MUST be killed.”? They’re not? Oh good. That’s a good thing.
Oh, by the way, that day I’ve been forecasting since the Clinton Impeachment – the one where we look back at how crazy the Right Wing [...]
Things you didn’t know to be afraid of
NAZI FRANKENSTEINS!
I was just listening to the Weather Channel and they’re suggesting that you stock up on water and don’t make any plans for this weekend because there’s an 80% chance of NAZI FRANKENSTEINS!
I’m sorry Carol, I would come to your daughter’s Quincera, but I’ve heard that there’s an incoming front of NAZI FRANKENSTEINS!
You’ve reached [...]
Elusive, Shifty Hooters Hoosiers
A drive through northern Indiana produces a lot of very expected scenery: barns, silos, corn & soy bean fields, half-standing barns, semi-trucks, American-made cars. It’s actually not a bad drive. There are a plethora of bumper stickers celebrating cold dead hands, but the scenery is otherwise very pretty. Especially fall through spring. Big trees, rolling [...]
Flu! Oh Noes! (and Other Lazy Reporting)
Must have been a terribly boring day for CNN yesterday.
There’s the phrase, “blood from a stone” or perhaps, “beating a dead horse” or my favorite, “fear-mongering to those that live by the headlines.” For 3-4 weeks, the news had this awesome pandemic story about the end of the world, and how people had [...]
Ok – Can anyone tell me…
What was Air Force 2 doing flying around the Statue of Liberty? I’ve been traveling, and all I’ve got are headlines and pictures of people running in the streets because Air Force 2, along with a couple F-16s, were flying around Ground Zero and the Statue of Liberty.
It seems to me that no one [...]
Is it OK to be a Pittsburgh Pirates fan yet?
Just wondering. Because I have noticed that the news surrounding “pirates” has died down a bit. Don’t know if that’s because of Obama’s handling of the situation, or because America has reached the “10-Day Deadening” – where, 10 days after a news story breaks, people stop caring.
I just think they let a captain [...]