Hey folks, Fred the Tuckpointer here trying to keep on believing in beautiful Cleveland, Ohio. Gotta be honest, I’m feeling really let down by the House GOP. I’m glad they repealed Obamacare right away, but the reality is unless the Senate pulls it too (yeah, right) we’re stuck till the next election cycle. What’s worse, I don’t get why Boehner doesn’t start the impeachment hearings against the “President”. See, I use “quotes” ’cause Obama shouldn’t even be able to hold office. That should be enough but even Cantor said Obama’s legit. So we’re stuck. There’s probably some behind the scene’s stuff going on. Remember that Obama’s the “President”, but that also means he’s The President, and he can have the Secret Service come pay you a visit. Ask Peyton Manning.
That’s right, sports fans. Last weekend was the Superbowl, and this year the big game was between Green Bay and…Pittsburgh. Hated, hated, Pittsburgh. If there’s one thing I hate more than Obama, its the Pittsburgh Steelers. And wouldn’t you know it, Obama LOVES the Steelers. So much that he’s always rooting for them. Rooting for scum bags like Harrison and the cad Roethlisberger who can’t keep his hands off the ladies. No morals whatever, not that it matters to Steelers fans, as long as they win. Unlike Cleveland fans, who are world class.
So of course I had to root for the Packers, but would it really matter? You better bet ol’ Obama was going to interfere again. He likes to interfere with big American institutions like the Free Market, the Superbowl, the Olympics…he just can’t help himself. I’m not exactly a Green Bay fan, but I have to root against the Steelers no matter what. Unless they’re playing the Baltimore Ravens. Then I can only hope they destroy each other. Burn in Hell Art Modell!
But as always, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel for this Conservative. I was looking over the roster of the Packers, and found the blood of the Browns flowing through their best player! I’m talking about Clay Matthews Jr – son of the greatest Browns D-back of all time, Clay Matthews Sr. Check it out – he looks like Conan the Barbarian:
Even though the Browns have sucked for the past 13 years, they would have a chance to beat the Steelers in the Super Bowl through the sire of Clay Sr. And you know what? The Matthews are CONSERVATIVES. I know that because I bought a truck a few years back from the old man. All small business owners are conservative, and that’s something you pass down to your kids. At least, I think that’s how it works. Sure enough, in the big game Clay Jr. forced an interception, and that was all the Pack needed to beat the Stillers. As the clock was clicking down, I half expected that Obama would give the order to start picking off the Packers, or just implode the entire stadium so that it would at least be a No Contest. And I’m sure he was behind some of their guys getting hurt earlier. But the Browns/Packers wouldn’t be denied. Even Obama can’t get away with that. So, World Champs Baby! Sort of. Time to start rubbing it in on the pathetic Pittspuke fans. As for Herr Dictator, better luck next year. And stop saying the Bears are your home team. These guys are.
I gotta run…Sadie says there’s a big sale on Power Bars at Giant Eagle. They’ve kind of become a staple in the Tuckpointer household. If I don’t get there soon, they’ll be picked over and I’m sick of the blueberry ones. Till next time, Fred the Tuckpointer signing off.