Damn You, Gays

Thankfully, the Catholic church has finally come right out and clarified the reason for the horrible child molestation scandal. Gays.

I’m seething with rage. Gays are ruining the Catholic church.

Why can’t you guys (gays) just go to to college, graduate with your degrees in musical theatre or magazine journalism, move to Boys Town, date, find a partner,¬†be happy being openly gay in an open and accepting community, dance your Friday and Saturday nights away at Berlin, work, make money, teach yoga and travel? Must you insist on years of solitary prayer and contemplation, an undergraduate degree in psychology, philosophy, religion or other equally boring degree, attend seminary school for another four to six years, act as a deacon for a church, intern until you’re ordained, spend most of your time alone, have no sex or family – all of this just so you can have secret, totally¬†unfulfilling sex with youngsters who aren’t even good at it?

Not so smart, gays, are you?

On a related note, what have you done to Vatican Secretary of State Tarcisio Bertone’s hand? Haven’t you done enough? Damn you, Gays!