Schadenfreude.net the Official Sponsor of Official Sponsors

The Mutual of Omaha has declared itself “Proud Sponsor of Life’s Aha Moments.”  The American Cancer Society claims to be “The Official Sponsor of Birthdays.”  I’m sure it won’t be long until other companies declare themselves the “Official Sponsor” of some random thing that doesn’t cost any money.

Might I suggest:
Apple — The Official Sponsor of Hype
Werther’s Original — The Official Sponsor of Old
The United States Congress — The Official Sponsor of Stagnation
McDonald’s — The Official Sponsor of Heart Attacks
Expired Chicken — The Official Sponsor of Taking Out the Trash
Dancing With the Stars — The Official Sponsor of Wanting to Shoot Yourself in the Face
Toyota — The Official Sponsor of Apologies
Twitter — The Official Sponsor of Life’s Who Cares Moments
NCIS — The Official Sponsor of Talking to the Corpse on the Autopsy Table
The O’Hare Airport Body Scanners — The Official Sponsor of Sexy

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