I’m sure you’ve seen this by now but The Vatican released their own review and opinion of my new favorite movie Avatar. Far be it from me to get into a public debate in front of our readership with an institution so widely-respected and forward-thinking as the Vatican about a movie starring fake blue people. (full disclosure: I love Avatar). But were I to publish a memo on a WordPress blog that can be linked-to and ReTweeted once or twice, I’d probably say this: Hey Vatican, calm down. Avatar is well-positioned to beat Titanic, and now that people are loading their blog tags with words like Avatar and Biggest Movie Ever, you make the splendid decision to release a statement that it sucks. Nice. The Vatican is starting to remind me of that sucky student group that would always complain about the lamest things like changing Pepsi to Coke at Hubble Dining Hall. Hey Vatican: it is a MOVIE. It’s not religion. It’s not worship. It’s a made-up fake story featuring actors who are pretending to be blue people. And, guess what, the people of the world have spoken: the math adds up. It’s super hot. It’s barely been out for 4 weeks and it’s raked-in nearly 1.4 billion dollars. That’s why the entire planet is saying to Hollywood “Hey Hollywood: let’s keep throwing James Cameron hundreds of millions of dollars, because he knows what he’s doing.” The President of BOLIVIA praised this movie because it’s so hot. And the Vatican decides to jump in and give it two thumbs down because, clearly, the World Court of Conventional Wisdom will, apparently, care. Here’s a marketing hint for the Vatican: during a time of longtime shall we say — image disrepair — the Vatican might want to publicly LOVE Avatar. Might be a better, more effective, smokescreen.