Disney to Marvel: I’ll f**k you til you love me, f****t!

marveldisneySo in case you hadn’t heard, Disney is pulling a Mike Tyson and is proceeding to eat Marvel’s asshole alive.

The last time Disney and Marvel got together it was to bicker about Howard the Duck (seen here seducing Marty McFly’s mother).

Most remember the 1986 film as the only first piece of evidence that George Lucas is the worst decision-maker over the age of 6. But this Marvel character actually dates back to 1973 and it was then that Disney decided to sue Marvel for copyright infringement.

Disney’s lawyers (seen here sucking the fun out of everything) sued Marvel, claiming that Howard the Duck bore too close a resemblence to Donald Duck. Not only were the lawyers successful in proving their case, they also convinced the judge to make Marvel use a Howard the Duck character design provided by Disney’s own animators.

This new character design seemed to be little more than Donald Duck doing two very Un-Donald things: chomping on a cigar and wearing pants. But the difference was enough for Disney. Marvel was allowed to continue the comic book and now had to pay a small royalty to Disney for character design.

So I’m sure it comes as a great relief to both companies that this complicated financial arrangement can finally be put to rest.

But what does the Disney/Marvel merger mean to us? I mean, besides this list becoming ten more kinds of creepy, what Disney/Marvel Team-Ups do you want to see? Doctor Strange & The Sorcerer’s Apprentice (closecloser)? How about Goofy and Deadpool in a dramatic retelling of the D.C. Sniper case? But I’ve always got sniper on the brain, what ideas would YOU like to see?