This is more of a plea than anything else.
Sundays during the summer are the traditional evening where you get to recoup from whatever you did on Saturday. Things move at a slower pace. If you’re tired enough, you may even be hoodwinked into watching the ABC Sunday Night Movie about teenage pregnancy because you didn’t even realize it was on.
However, there are those out there that like to schedule BBQs on Sundays. I’m all for that. A pound of raw meat thrown on a grill until cooked, and then devoured with any combination of condiments – I’m totally in. Hell, I’ll even bring beer, brats, buns or any combination of the three. I’m all for it. ESPECIALLY if the weather permits.
What I’m not into is the concept that a BBQ is scheduled to begin, at, say 3.30 – and I arrive at 3.30 – and the grill isn’t being brushed, fired or charcoal isn’t being loaded that moment. Worse yet? When I show up at 3.30 – I get the comments “Oh! You gonna help sweep?” or “Wow – someone’s early!” No, I’m not here to help, and no, I’m not here early – YOU said 3.30 – so that’s when I showed up. Let’s get this thing going!
Because, you see, now everything is at least an hour behind. Because once people start arriving, nothing every goes according to plan. You can’t say, “I’m just gonna run out and fire up the grill…” Because Aunt Lizzie just walked in the door, and now you have to have the big discussion about the fact you changed email addresses, and now the really funny picture of the cat with the New York Times that she sent you keeps getting bounced back. If you don’t want to eat until 6 – then fine – tell me the start time is 6.
Yeah, maybe it’s because I’m old, or a curmudgeon, or a baby (no one says anything when a family shows up late and leaves early because the kids have specific nap times) or maybe, I would expect people to have a little more respect for time. I’d like to get home before 9PM on Sunday, that’s just me. NOW – if you move it to Saturday, there’s a little more wiggle room – but Sundays – don’t fuck with Sundays.
I’ve had 2 BBQs during my stint as a homeowner. (Technically, I still am a homeowner, I just don’t live there) Each time – the grill was warming by the time the first guests came through my gate.
(I do realize that this post will dramatically reduce the number of BBQ invites I receive this summer, and that’s OK)
Formed in 1997, Schad began performing sketch comedy on Chicago’s north side. The troupe has since performed at countless venues around the world including The Goodman Theatre, The Second City, Steppenwolf, Lollapalooza, ImprovOlympic, the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre (LA), HERE (NYC) and the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
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All content © 2010 by Schadenfreude.
As a frequent host of BBQs on Sundays, Saturdays, holiday Mondays, and any other time the weather pretends to be almost nice out; I feel the need to offer an opposing viewpoint.
In my experience, the overwhelming majority of guests do not arrive at the “start” time of a BBQ. Being a generally casual event tends to invite a certain casualness in regards to arrival time. If I light the charcoal at or before 3:30 (to use your example), I’ll have only a small handful of guests when those coals are at their prime for perfectly searing that steak, charring those dogs, or roasting those spatchcocked chickens.
Then, when the bulk of my guests have arrived and are eagerly awaiting tasty grilled meats, I have seriously dwindling coals. This leaves me with 2 (not ideal) options: slowly, slowly grill meats over the remnants; or add more charcoal and wait for the heat to come up. Obviously, if I used a gas grill; this wouldn’t be an issue – but if I’m cooking with gas, I might as well be cooking in the kitchen.
A secondary point: generally speaking, guests at my functions tend to be hungriest at around the time they normally eat their final meal of the day – between 5 and 7 generally. At 3:30, a lot of people are still pretty satisfied from their lunch – and for those ravenous few, a good host always has plenty of other, non-grill-reliant foodstuffs to hold them over.
Hey Stephe, remind me to judge you next time I host you at my home, okay?
Hey listen, I’m sorry if I ask for a little punctuality. Ok – I understand that things are “laid back” – but if you say the start time is 3.30 – at least have some chips/salsa or something else out, and some beer/soda/wine cooling. Don’t get all in a huff because I showed up on time, ready to PAR-TAY.
And also realizing that people come in waves, as host, I am fully prepared to cook food in waves. I appreciate the people who showed up on time, and realize they may have other plans, and cook for them, on time. THEN – I do put more coals on, and get round 2 ready for the Lazy Sunday-ers.
Whatever happened to punctuality?