You’re not clever.

star-trek-spock1Can a single review of Star Trek not mention how big of a dick you’re supposed to be if you liked Star Trek before the guy who created Felicity decided to lower himself to the material and make it safe for Todd Voorhies. I’ll sum up every review I’ve read on Star Trek: “Despite that fact that Star Trek is for assholes I think you can like this one without surrendering your Drakkar, fake beat-up baseball cap and ironically consumed PBR.”

Throw that in a blender with clever insightful HILARIOUS observation that everyone who made Star Trek a billion dollar franchise lives in their Mom’s basements and jacks off to Anime and you get most of the reviews I’ve read. None of you are clever. These are the “Monica Lewinsky” of social commentary. Get it? Because Clinton got a blowjob – observed that one myself because I’m so scary smart when it comes to noticing society. Sandy calls these the “Toshi Station” of observations. Yes, Mark Hamill had a bad read on that line, we got it. You’re awesome.