I killed at Indiana Jones last night

Sorry I would’ve published this earlier, but I was watching Indiana Jones…again, with another friend. So there’s my review, I got up this morning after seeing Indiana Jones at midnight and saw it again. It is SO great to see Indiana Jones do anything, and he does a lot in this one. In my farthest dreams I never thought it would work out that there would even be another Indiana Jones, much less that I would be back in Chicago and seeing it with the whole Phantom Menace crew. But the big news isn’t just that there’s a sequel to my favorite movie of all time, the big news is that I killed at the movie last night. I kept the back row of the AMC 21 laughing quite a bit, but because it’s a spoiler laden rant. Meet me after the jump, and if you haven’t seen it, don’t read this. I enjoyed this movie much more than people who had read the plot beforehand. So, here’s the big spoiler, again, if you haven’t seen the movie, abort mission. 

***The Crystal Skull is an Incan Artifact, the Incans, it turns out, were visited by aliens thousands of years ago, at the end of the movie some very alien stuff happens***

People were really shocked that Indiana Jones dipped that far into sci-fi, and the audience was that sort of Phantom Menace oddly silent. I think just like with Star Wars, people forget exactly what the first three movies were. So to break the tension and defend every bold choice in the movie I stand up and start ranting:

Aliens!? You’ve got to be kidding me. ALIENS! In a SPIELBERG movie!? That’s where I draw the line. Now he’s out of control. Aliens have no place in an Indiana Jones movie! Sure I’ll accept the power of God sending ghosts out of a golden casket and melting the faces of an army, sure I’ll accept Mola Ram pulling the beating heart out of a man, or a 1,000 drop from a plane in a lifeboat, sure I’ll take a 2,000 year old Templar Knight with eternal life by drinking out of the cup of Christ, but ALIENS? Fuck that! How could Steven Spielberg forget his roots, why doesn’t he go back to Raiders, and the movie he made before that and the movie he made after that. ALIENS? ALIENS?!! From the director of Schindler’s List!! And I don’t even WANT to talk about how far George Lucas has come from his roots.

I got a lot of laughs from people that didn’t know how to put this movie in perspective and hopefully sent them out enjoying it as much as I did. Problems? Oh, yes, it has problems, but rent 20,000 BC again if you want to see a flawless masterpiece. Oh, and then after all that and a lot of laughs from the people around me. We all watched the credits play out to the end and I threw in. 

Indiana Jones, I want to talk to you about the Avengers project. 

More laughs. That’s my time, try the combo meal, you save a $1.