Frivolous Lawsuits.

n502092683_124530_3770.jpgWhenever I hear of a silly, ridiculous lawsuit in the news, I visualize hundreds of hours of wasted staff time, idle devotion and withering energy. Even though tales of million-dollar-pairs-of-pants lost at the dry cleaners and spilled-hot-cups-of-coffee-carrying-no-warning-labels-for-complete-morons are long gone and now associated with laughable ridicule, a woman in Minnesota is giving it one last go by suing Best Buy for $54 million for a lost laptop computer. On top of that, some guy out west filed suit against A TWELVE YEAR OLD KID for colliding into him on the mountain. Come on. What kind of self-hating pussy sues a kid on a ski hill? You got hit by a kid. Boo hoo. Man up, laugh it off. You took your computer to the Geek Squad and they lost it. Did you accept the refund plus an extra five hundo? You did, huh? And you’re still suing for $54 mill? Douche. I must be in the wrong business, guys. These lawsuits must be hidden, floating retirement plans available to only the most cunning and clever of America’s disgruntled consumers. Maybe I should target an industry in the US that has yet to experience an aimless “let’s-set-an-example!!” lawsuit and then get paiiiiiid. Wait, I think I’ve found a way to finance our movie…



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