Glurg Glurg Glurg Douche of the Day Glurg Glurg

phone_in_toilet.jpg

Me for dropping my phone in a toilet at a bar on Irving & Damen. I’d been meaning to swap-out for a new one, and as luck would have it, finally had to that this weekend after dropping the phone in some crap-ass bar bathroom. Should this happen to you, a few tips:


1.) Suck in your gut and fish it out immediately.

2.) Smile. Coulda been a port-a-potty at a 5K or a squat toilet in Burma.

3.) Leave the bar, tell everyone you’re calling it a night.

4.) Really try to dry it off, even though it’s pretty futile after total tank submersion.

5.) Return the phone to the store. Hint! Don’t pawn it off as “some screwy bug in the system.” You’ll get points for fessing-up. There’s a little hidden dot that turns red when damaged with water so the guys in the store can call you out.

6.) Don’t tell the workers it was in a toilet. They won’t want to touch it. Would you?

7.) Start to think about you’ve done to deserve dropping-your-phone-when-it-shoulda-been-a-crap-in-the-toilet-karma.

8.) When people ask why the new phone, tell the truth immediately. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, it happens to all guys at least once.

phone_in_toilet.jpg

Me for dropping my phone in a toilet at a bar on Irving & Damen. I’d been meaning to swap-out for a new one, and as luck would have it, finally had to that this weekend after dropping the phone in some crap-ass bar bathroom. Should this happen to you, a few tips:


1.) Suck in your gut and fish it out immediately.

2.) Smile. Coulda been a port-a-potty at a 5K or a squat toilet in Burma.

3.) Leave the bar, tell everyone you’re calling it a night.

4.) Really try to dry it off, even though it’s pretty futile after total tank submersion.

5.) Return the phone to the store. Hint! Don’t pawn it off as “some screwy bug in the system.” You’ll get points for fessing-up. There’s a little hidden dot that turns red when damaged with water so the guys in the store can call you out.

6.) Don’t tell the workers it was in a toilet. They won’t want to touch it. Would you?

7.) Start to think about you’ve done to deserve dropping-your-phone-when-it-shoulda-been-a-crap-in-the-toilet-karma.

8.) When people ask why the new phone, tell the truth immediately. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, it happens to all guys at least once.

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