Douche of the Day: Bees

For all the producers who are worried they don’t have writer’s to write their movies, try this “Phylum + Human Characteristics” Have it in my theatres by Friday. It’s Antz meets ANOTHER insect. But screw bees in general. Next to my edit suite a colony of bees has found a hole in the garage and decided to take up shop. Bees are considered so austere as insects go, and yet every night I see them banging into the night lights just like stupid junebugs

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For all the producers who are worried they don’t have writer’s to write their movies, try this “Phylum + Human Characteristics” Have it in my theatres by Friday. It’s Antz meets ANOTHER insect. But screw bees in general. Next to my edit suite a colony of bees has found a hole in the garage and decided to take up shop. Bees are considered so austere as insects go, and yet every night I see them banging into the night lights just like stupid junebugs – the beer drinking Bubba of insects. Douches, just like all insects. The respectable austerity of bees never transceneds to sweat bees, I never see a Nature documentary on the delicate and beautiful way sweat bees communicate to one another where the great puddle of vomit is at the fair. And what’s with bumblebees? How come I never see a hive of them? What are these things? Who ARE these people?…I just realized this whole column comes off better where read in a Jerry Seinfeld voice.

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