BREAKING: Thou Shalt Not Drive Like A Little Bitch

Dog driving vintage vehicle.jpg

So, thank goodness, in an attempt to save the world from road rage, the Vatican just released the 10 Commandments for Good Motorists. Officially titled Guidelines for the Pastoral Care of the Road, it basically says to let people into the middle lane and to tell others to Go F Yourself as you would say Go F Yourself unto you. And don’t buy a car because it makes you look cool.


Sorry, what’s that? Because I don’t look cool? We know that commandment won’t work, because not everybody drives a PT Cruiser.


File this as another example of why The Vatican is typically 100-200 years late to address Any Given Issue. Sex in cars and road rage is nothing new. Countless were concieved in Model-T’s. Stagecoaches of the Old West had yielding issues. Battles of honor were fought in the Middle Ages over who could cross the bridge first.


SERIOUSLY Vatican?


Road rage rages come and go just like diets and exercise programs and new wave synthpop. Wake-up: there’s no road rage, just like there’s no one right way to eat. People drive, most of them are kind, sometimes they’re assholes, and every once in a while they flip out.


Next issue.

Dog driving vintage vehicle.jpg

So, thank goodness, in an attempt to save the world from road rage, the Vatican just released the 10 Commandments for Good Motorists. Officially titled Guidelines for the Pastoral Care of the Road, it basically says to let people into the middle lane and to tell others to Go F Yourself as you would say Go F Yourself unto you. And don’t buy a car because it makes you look cool.


Sorry, what’s that? Because I don’t look cool? We know that commandment won’t work, because not everybody drives a PT Cruiser.


File this as another example of why The Vatican is typically 100-200 years late to address Any Given Issue. Sex in cars and road rage is nothing new. Countless were concieved in Model-T’s. Stagecoaches of the Old West had yielding issues. Battles of honor were fought in the Middle Ages over who could cross the bridge first.


SERIOUSLY Vatican?


Road rage rages come and go just like diets and exercise programs and new wave synthpop. Wake-up: there’s no road rage, just like there’s no one right way to eat. People drive, most of them are kind, sometimes they’re assholes, and every once in a while they flip out.


Next issue.

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