Tuesday 24 Wrap Up – 3 AM – 4 AM

All someone needs is a cup of coffee at 3 AM. If you’re up, you’re sleepy. Unless your Jack. At 3 AM, you realize that there are only 3 hours left before you have to save the world.

So last night we learned that the Russians aren’t as dumb as we thought they were, that Jack shoots better when he’s running vs. standing still, and that the US Government is as dumb as we thought they were.

And don’t worry Nadia, we don’t blame you for what happened. Except the whole Milo getting shot thing. That should have been you.

Find out why China is so great, and why Old Farmer Hodgett wants to take Jack’s son nephew there after the jump.

All someone needs is a cup of coffee at 3 AM. If you’re up, you’re sleepy. Unless your Jack. At 3 AM, you realize that there are only 3 hours left before you have to save the world.

So last night we learned that the Russians aren’t as dumb as we thought they were, that Jack shoots better when he’s running vs. standing still, and that the US Government is as dumb as we thought they were.

And don’t worry Nadia, we don’t blame you for what happened. Except the whole Milo getting shot thing. That should have been you.

Find out why China is so great, and why Old Farmer Hodgett wants to take Jack’s son nephew there after the jump.

All someone needs is a cup of coffee at 3 AM. If you’re up, you’re sleepy. Unless your Jack. At 3 AM, you realize that there are only 3 hours left before you have to save the world.

So last night we learned that the Russians aren’t as dumb as we thought they were, that Jack shoots better when he’s running vs. standing still, and that the US Government is as dumb as we thought they were.

And don’t worry Nadia, we don’t blame you for what happened. Except the whole Milo getting shot thing. That should have been you.

So it takes Jack and a crew about 2 1/2 minutes to locate the point of entry for the Chinese. Why didn’t someone do that when they were building the freakin’ building?? And again, I ask why does James Cromwell have to be the creepy Grandpa? He’s not the kind of guy that I can envision Baby Bauer running up to and screaming, “GAMPA”. I have the feeling that Phillip would have shot him. But that’s just me. After a couple of awesome shoot-outs that all happen in the first 20 minutes, my favorite line of the episode:

Baby Bauer: He said that he loved me, that he wanted to take me to China. He said that I was his legacy. I think he’s out of his mind.

Do ya kid? Do you think your grandfather is out of his mind? Your definitely CTU in training.

So. Here we are at 3 AM. Jack has killed his “best friend” (Curtis), realized that the woman he loved had her son (Marilyn) ok, we haven’t learned that, but we will, realized the other woman he loved, but thought he’d never see again, who was supposed to die, but is alive, but who’s father hates his guts, even though he saved the father’s life multiple times (Audrey), and that little Ricky wants to be Jack Jr., but all he’ll manage to be is a footnote in the storylines of CTU. On top of that, all these days are making Jack soft. If you have the guy who tortured you for the better part of 18 months in your sights, and you hear your son nephew, you plug him in the leg to keep him from running, then go save your son nephew. *Sigh* Seems like another day in LA to me.

So once again, Nadia gets a cheerleader talk from the alcoholic, and an nod of support from The Rickker, as well as a “that was brave” from Chloe, who is still as scowling as ever. Add to that the choking charge of the Russian spy, and you’ve got yourself a questionable women’s lib movement – eh, 24 writers? And if you count it – Lisa had sex with the Russian spy for about 30 minutes. And Lenox saying, “And. They’re done.” C’mon. You’ve got the fate of the free world in your hands, and your cracking wise about some stud’s performance (keep in mind they just had sex an hour before – so in the last two hours, they had sex for 1 hour, and an hour lying to each other)? And if my wife EVER made that face to me when we were finished making love – yeah – I’d be a little suspicious. I would think something was up. I would think that she knows I’m spying for the Russians. But that’s the kind of guy I am.

Well – at least that lame storyline is wrapped up. If we DARE find out what happened to Lisa, and yet still never find out what happened to Logan – someone is going to die. How do the writers decide which storylines to wrap, and which to just…. forget? Logan = wrap. Miller = forget. Take that note, writers.

HA ha ha ha. Ohhhh… yes. Was wondering when this was going to happen. The point at which the NEW staff comes in, and picks the current staff to hell. Welcome to 24 Ben Cramm, where you come in like a dick, and leave like a supporting character who either dies, or buys into the whole “Jack can do no wrong” thing. Anyone taking bets? This was the point when Karen stepped in last season, and now she’s relegated to being married, and making the “astonished” face when someone does something true to character (ie. handing over Jack’s son nephew to Ole’ Jamie Cromwell. So… What’s Ben’s fate? Me? I say he (of course) complicates Jack getting assistance over the next two hours, and in the end, Nadia will stand up to him, put him in jail, and she’ll win her battle over the evil men in her life. AND THEN – she will kiss the Rickker – and they will become the new Tony and Michelle for next season. But hey – anything can happen. Either that, or he dies. It could go either way.

And it’s even harder to lie over video-conference than it is over the phone. Believe me, I video-chatted with my wife for three years. When you’re drunk, or surfing porn, they know. Or if you’re lying about destroying the FB-Sub-Circuit Board. They know. They know. But c’mon Karen, the least you could do is play along a little better. You really need to practice lying if you’re gonna make it in politics.

So The Rickker steals Baby Bauer because the White House tells him? And Karen is so aweosmely shocked that he would even order such a thing. And this brings me to Rule #2876 of 24:

If ever you need to distract someone, just wave a phone in the air, and tell the person that “They have a phone call.” They always fall for it, and it allows you to either steal a son nephew, or steal you away to China. A perfect ruse.

Hey Jack – form now on – if someone needs to get a hold of you – make them call your phone.

Next week is the big finale. What we’ve been waiting all season for. It’s the 2 Hour extravanganza which will change the way we look at Jack, and the world. Me? I think we finally learn that Jack has a nephew son. And that Nadia can act on her own without needing some prompting, or the affirmation of a man. And we learn that Bill isn’t as whipped as we thought. And that the Russians don’t really want war, no matter what Cisco may wants us to believe. See you next week!

PS. I don’t want an AmEx – but I’m considering getting one to see what happens on 5/21 with the whole “debrief” thing. Did anyone else see that, or did you blow through the commercial as well?

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