Coffee vs. Capitalism

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One would think that coffee would stand for caplitalism in this country, but not at Filter, the coffee shop on North, Damen & Milwaukee, is on its way out. Turns out that Bank of America has decided to open a branch at Filter’s curent location. No big deal, right? Well not if you ask the hipsters. More after the jump!

filter1.jpg

One would think that coffee would stand for caplitalism in this country, but not at Filter, the coffee shop on North, Damen & Milwaukee, is on its way out. Turns out that Bank of America has decided to open a branch at Filter’s curent location.



No big deal, right? Well not if you ask the hipsters.


Check this out:


The Chicago Transit Authority will actually have to charter 1-2 buses per week in order to transport Filter Hipsters to another Hipster Coffee Shop (ideally located in the Ukranian Village) that allows them to hog tables for 9 hours at a time and wax about how great it’d be to be an agrarian dust farmer in North America instead working on their next great proposal for the National Endowment for the Arts.



Well, guess what — when a bank moves in a neighborhood to replace a hipster coffee shop, it’s all part of the cycle of what we call neighborhood renewal. It’s a good thing, fellas.


I’m not too worried about the kids that spend their entire Tuesdays working on their Mac laptops at Filter, they’ll quickly find another hang-out that will allow them to wear stocking hats and burn Zero 7 CD’s with copies of “Germinal” by Emile Zola splayed across the tops of their CamelBak hydration packs.


So starting in 2008, should you find yourself at the corner of North, Damen & Milwaukee needing cash, you’ll be able to find cash at any of 19 ATM’s. Plus, Bank of America maintains a strict and enforcable “No Pissing on our Block” policy, so hopefully all public pissing will be limited to the outdoor 2 am hot dog stand and that one Sultan of India store.


But that’s a story for a different day . . .