Damn – You Can’t Make Fun of New Orleans

Grossman - Miller.jpg

After we beat up on Seattle all last week with great Eddie Vedder/Frasier Crane jokes, I thought for sure we were onto something. The way for me to help the Bears win and make it to the Super Bowl was to break down the opponents and their fans, mentally.

Grossman - Miller.jpgAfter we beat up on Seattle all last week with great Eddie Vedder/Frasier Crane jokes, I thought for sure we were onto something. The way for me to help the Bears win and make it to the Super Bowl was to break down the opponents and their fans, mentally. Once they realized Chicago fans were biting and willing to get into the mud, they would be intimidated and it would ripple up (as Reagan used to say) all the way to the players and they would lose 27-24 in Overtime.

Grossman - Miller.jpg

After we beat up on Seattle all last week with great Eddie Vedder/Frasier Crane jokes, I thought for sure we were onto something. The way for me to help the Bears win and make it to the Super Bowl was to break down the opponents and their fans, mentally. Once they realized Chicago fans were biting and willing to get into the mud, they would be intimidated and it would ripple up (as Reagan used to say) all the way to the players and they would lose 27-24 in Overtime. Great plan, right? So let’s just rinse and repeat right? So who’s this week’s opponent? The Philadelphia fat-asses? Or maybe the white trash-talking New York Giants? Nope, it’s the New Orleans Saints.

Ouch. Now, I am known for small, easy, light-hearted jokes about Katrina. I’ve even watched someone walk away from me in disgust after a Girls Gone Wild/Katrina joke. But in football, you can’t pull punches. You have to go for the jugular and commit 100 percent. Coach Ditka taught me that. So how do you go for the jugular against the New Orleans Saints? Hey Reggie Bush? You suck. Hey Joe Horn? Why don’t you put a cell phone in your johnson. Hey Brees? Nice last name you Purdue dumb-ass. Hey, I wish we played in a dome where thousands of refugee…..oh shit. SEE!? Invetiably, you go for the jugular. So what should I do? Ooooh, how bout this one? Once we beat you, we’ll come down and help you rebuild.

What do I do here? COME ON, help me out!

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